Friday, May 25, 2007

Most Frightening Day of My Life

It has been a long while since my last entry and so much has happened during this period of time.
However, nothing prepared me for what happened yesterday.

Actually, I've been feeling unwell since last Friday. Big bumps started appearing on my head and neck and rashes on my face. Went to the doctor at RMG Jurong East after flight last Saturday, but even the doctor couldn't tell what was wrong. In the end, he prescribed some antibotics and medication for inflammation and itch. Took the medication but it didn't seem to help at all, but maybe it needed some time and I didn't think about it. Although I had a medical certificate for Sunday, I still went to work as usual because I didn't feel very sick except for the itch.

But since Monday, I kept having very bad headaches whenever I woke up. It didn't matter if I had slept for 8 hours or less than that. And my left eye was so swollen by Tuesday. And the headaches got worse. On Wednesday, it was the same. Woke up with a very bad headache but I didn't want to report sick for my flight as it was a short flight to Kota Kinabalu. Took a few panadols before I went to only managed to help a little. Upon reaching Kota Kinabalu, I felt like puking suddenly....and so, out came my lunch....but I actually felt a lot better after that.

Woke up with a bad headache again yesterday morning but I still decided to go to work because I will be off today. So I took some panadol and went to work as usual. Everything was fine except I had difficulties in breathing at times but I didn't give too much thought to it. Upon reaching the aircraft, I proceeded to do my work as I was assigned the galley duties. Somehow, I suddenly felt anxious and kept breaking out in cold sweat. Not only that, I couldn't bear any noise and even walking around in the cabin was quite stressful for me but I kept telling myself to relax. During take-off, it got so bad that I kept clutching my fists till my knuckles turned white. As it was a full load, I kept telling myself to relax and not to think so much.

Didn't managed to do much during the meal service because there was a lot of side orders to prepare, but I felt that I wasn't in control of my body. My hands had started to tremble but I thought maybe it was because I was too tired...even when I was talking to the passengers, I had to talk slowly because even talking seem to be so hard.

Managed to complete the 1st round of the meal service and I had pushed back the cart in to galley to prepare for the 2nd round of service. Was preparing the new set of coffee and tea when I suddenly felt like crying and all of a sudden, I couldn't control myself anymore. I pulled the colleague who was standing near to me and I told her I couldn't control myself and started crying and trembling like was like I was having fits. My whole body was fingers were all clutched up...and I couldn't even talk.

By then, my colleague had informed my CIC and they had to lie me down in the galley and they had to give me oxygen. I was so scared during the whole period of time because I couldn't talk at at and I couldn't control my body. I could only nod or shake my head and even then, it was very difficult. There was no medical personnel on board so we could only wait till when we had landed into Surabaya before they could get a doctor to attend to me.

Upon reaching Surabaya, the doctor said I had to stay in Surabaya but I didn't want to, so they decided to bring me to the clinic at the airport for observation. As my blood pressure and pulse was very high, the doctor had to bring down the blood pressure and pulse before they could allow me to go on board. After keeping me under observation for about 45 minutes, they managed to bring down the blood pressure and pulse, and so I was allowed to come back to Singapore.

On the flight back, I wasn't allowed to work so I took a rest, but I couldn't sleep because my hand was still trembling and my head was aching again. In my heart, I was really very scared. There was so much on my mind...and the worse part was I didn't know what was happening. The only thing that I could do was to wait till we land into Singapore and see the doctor at the RMG Clinic at Terminal 2. Upon landing, a wheelchair was waiting for me at the gate as they didn't want me to walk...but I don't think I had the energy to walk at all.

Mummy was already waiting for me at the gate at arrival hall by the time we came out because the people from the company had informed her. She accompanied me to the doctor together with my CIC, my batch girl Fadillah, our Capt and FO. Had to wait a while to see the doctor cause there were a few patients in front of me.

After my CIC had explained to the doctor about what had happened, the doctor told me that I had had a panic attack and the cause of it could be due to fatigue and stress. As he was afraid that there might something wrong, he schedule me to go blood test today.

Had gone for the blood test this afternoon and right now, all I can do is to wait for the results.

Right now, I'm praying that nothing serious will happen.

Will blog more the next few days on my thoughts on this incident and what has happened during this period of time that I had not been blogging. Going to take my medication and get some rest first.

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